3 Tips to a Creating a Calmer You

By: Dawn Sylvester

It’s not easy these days to ward off feelings of uneasiness.
Even if you’ve been the powerful one in the past, now you may be experiencing feelings of fear and anxiety. Possibly, you’re replaying the most negative thoughts and images over and over…keeping your nervousness at an all-time high.

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It’s normal to have times in your life when you feel a loss of control. However, it’s comforting to know that you can choose to move away from negativity, and replace your thoughts with ones of peace. Some of us go through life searching for happiness. While others appear to never have a care in the world. Negative thoughts and events are a natural part of life.

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But when the bad thoughts take over, it’s time to do something to change the path so that you can feel centered and at peace. Acknowledging how we feel is the best way to know when stress is taking over. That is the time to practice methods that can reduce negative feelings while coaching you to a relaxed mental place.


When we feel peaceful, we breathe deeply, and a sense of calm washes over us. We feel in control. When we feel stressed, we take shallow breaths, feeling tight and uneasy. Our sense of control is lost. This can cause years of discomfort including job loss, poor health, and bad relationships.

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  1. Try to become aware of the minute you feel your body tense up after a stressful situation. Acknowledge the feeling, then close your eyes, taking a slow deep breath in. Hold for a count of 2. Now slowly exhale and imagine that feeling floating away. Repeat until your body feels calm.
  2. Imagine going into a situation that makes your heart race for fear of something going wrong.  Before the event, sit down for 5 minutes and imagine the situation in your mind, from beginning to end, and imagine it going perfectly. This guided imagery will help calm your jitters as you already will have imagined the outcome will be a positive one!
  3. Are you feeling pain or feeling restricted physically from a stressful day? Can’t seem to sleep because your mind won’t turn off. Lay on your back with arms at your sides, palms facing up and a pillow under your knees. Starting at your toes, working your way up to the top of your head, breathe in deeply and exhale slowly, while reciting in your mind…” my toes are relaxed and calm”. “My ankles are relaxed and stress-free.” “The tension in my calves is fading”. “The tightness in my legs is releasing”…

You get it right? I’ll bet you don’t get very far in your thoughts and will find yourself calmly drifting off to deep and restorative sleep.

Your feelings and thoughts may be bad on some days. But how long you decide to keep them is up to you. You have a choice.  These are 3 tools I’ve used in life to calm stress and move to feelings of happiness and peace. I’m sure they’ll work for you too!

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